A new neighbor moved in across the street from my parent’s home. Stopping his lawnmower, my dad walked across the street to meet him. Repeated street crossings produced an amicable friendship and then the discovery was made.
The new neighbor was a widower and had lung cancer. My dad began to help him do odd jobs around his home and my mom took over meals. Over time they had several gospel conversations. Mom and dad invited him to their home Bible study and then to church. He came once to both events.
“Why do you think he didn’t return?” I asked my dad.
“I think he was self-conscious about coughing and spitting up stuff,” was my dad’s reply.
But there’s a happy ending. The neighbor came to faith and my father participated in his baptism.
What I appreciated about mom and dad was that the neighbor wasn’t a project; someone to invite to “take a friend to church Sunday.” My parents didn’t extend love to this neighbor because they were retired ministry professionals. Dad had been a butcher – a meat cutter – all his life and mom worked in the school cafeteria. They were good neighbors because they believed that’s what Jesus’ disciples do (Luke 10:36-38) – they walk across the street and love their neighbor. My parents lived in the quiet of a mobile home park as insiders loving their neighbors in practical ways.
An insider’s ministry is nestled in the quiet – everyday people in everyday routines having everyday conversations. An obscure New Testament passage says it well: “Make it your ambition to lead a quiet life . . . so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders” (1 Thessalonians 4:11-12).
Insider ministry is done in the “quiet” of our neighborhoods, workplaces, or family settings. The popular devotional writer Oswald Chambers knew this to be true: “One of the most amazing revelations of God comes when we learn that it is in the common place things that the Deity of Jesus is realized.” Packed auditoriums, dynamic preaching, or evangelism programs are not the norm for Jesus’ disciples. They know that God often starts with the small and works in the quiet.
“The metaphors Jesus used for the life of ministry are frequently images of the single, the small, and the quiet, which have effects far in excess of their appearance, “writes author and pastor Eugene Peterson. Jesus described evangelism in the simple ways of a lost sheep, a lost coin, or a lost son (Luke 15). An insider’s ministry takes place in the simple quiet everyday routines and among everyday people.
What does living in the quiet look like?
Living in the quiet means being faithful. Kingdom living, explains Jesus, is not about the show (Matthew 6:1). In fact, most of it is done in the quiet – where my left hand doesn’t know what the right is doing (Matthew 6:3). We faithfully pray, give, and fast without calling attention to ourselves because it’s the right thing to do. We’re not motivated by the latest ministry campaign or motivational book. We do what is right because we desire to be faithful to our Lord. My parents loved the neighbor because they chose to be faithful.
Living in the quiet means taking initiative. In a world where people drive into their garages, close the door, and never come out again; where front porches are absent from a home’s design; and where people prefer a small circle of friends — Jesus’ disciples take the initiative to move towards others. Looking again at the parables in Luke 15 – we take the initiative to find the lost coin, the lost sheep, or love the lost son. As Jesus’ disciples, it is always our move.
Two simple practices encourage initiative. It’s hard, particularly for us introverts, but we can simply walk across the street or the office hallway and meet people. It’s always our move. The second practice is to know people’s names. Work at remembering the names of co-workers or neighbors. They may not do the same but that’s expected – after all, it’s always our move.
Living in the quiet means taking little steps of love. What are small ways you can love a neighbor, co-worker, or family member? Can you shovel a sidewalk in the winter, volunteer to rake leaves in the fall, or take care of a yard or mail when people leave for vacation? If you’ve won the respect of outsiders, then they will invite you into their lives. An easy way to earn respect is through small acts of kindness.
Living in the quiet means raising our faith flags. Find opportunities to simply and naturally identify yourself as a Christian. Start conversations that are “salty” and full of grace (Colossians 6). In a recent conversation with a new acquaintance, I mentioned how our church was serving a local public elementary school. He volunteered that he attended church. Now I have an opportunity to take the conversation deeper.
I plan to ask some questions like: “What church do you attend?” “How has church attendance shaped your life?” or “What are you learning about God from church attendance?” I’m not going to ask all these questions at once, but I will ask one and see where the conversation goes from there. I can now raise my faith flag a little higher.
Let’s celebrate the opportunity to represent Jesus in the quiet of where we live, work, or play. The effects of my parent’s ministry were “far in excess of their appearance” as a retired meat cutter or a school cafeteria worker. Dad and mom were everyday people living in what Peterson calls the “splendor of the ordinary.” That’s what insiders do – they live in the quiet – the splendor of the everyday life.
Take up the insider challenge and choose to live in the quiet – wining the respect of the outsiders around you, starting gospel conversations.
Time to reflect
What does living in the quiet mean in your life?
Why do you think God often starts with the small and in the quiet?
How can our lives win the respect of others and open up faith conversations?
Books to read
The Art of Neighboring: Building Genuine Relationships Right Outside Your Door by Jay Pathak & Dave Runyon
Out of the Saltshaker and Into the World – Rebeccah Manley Pippert
